Succubus Soul Page 4

  There were kids in the warmer months, then, too—kids without parents, and Derek, since his parents were in Veras, too—so it was always a school. Never just a home.

  My aunt and her four husbands had a place of their own—Lacey’s home-away-from-home since her brother lived there. I’d been envious more than once that my own parents had never settled on living arrangements that would bring us all together as a family.

  Then again, since our family was so unconventional, maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing.

  “Okay,” said Rajani, having clearly thought things over. That made one of us. “So these princes are handsome?”

  Why was that the first question she asked? Never mind. This was Rajani I was speaking to. “Does it matter?” I growled.

  “Uh, yeah, it doesn’t hurt, that’s for sure.” She rolled her eyes. “Never mind. Grapevine answered that for me anyway. Everyone’s talking about their display in your biology class.”

  “Yeah, we didn’t really learn any biology.”

  “Oh, Pepper says there was quite a lot of rough biology on display.”

  “What does that even mean?” I clutched the pillow hard. Pepper was an idiot.

  My phone buzzed from the nightstand housing the small, utilitarian lamp beside my bed. Derek was messaging me. Probably to ask why I was so late to dinner.

  I curled my knees up to my chest. The princes were likely in the dining hall getting dinner, too. I’d wait until midnight to go eat if I had to.

  Rajani’s stomach grumbled, but she didn’t comment on it. “All your parents want you to do, at minimum, is go on a date with each of them. One date each.”

  “You make it sound so reasonable.”

  Rajani shook her head. “If it were me, I wouldn’t even blink. Yes, wine me and dine me, charming storybook princes.” She lay back on the bed, a dreamy look clouding her eyes.

  “And what happened to a certain Nelian guard?”

  She giggled. “He said he’d give me a personal tour of Nelia sometime. Maybe over spring break.”

  “We’re supposed to go to the beach over spring break. Just you and me,” I said. True, we’d just planned on kind of winging it—no reservations were made or anything, but Pop Nash had said we could borrow his car. A girls’ road trip. To the real beach at the ocean, not the lake.

  “Yes, well, by then you might find yourself occupied with one or more princes.”

  “Or more?” I groaned and lay back in my bed, rolling toward the wall so I could avoid looking at her wriggling eyebrows.

  After a moment of silence, Rajani spoke more quietly. “I’m sorry all this pressure is on you. I know it hasn’t been easy.”

  “I haven’t taken this Nelian throne business seriously at all, though,” I admitted softly. “I just… always begged my parents to stop putting it all on me right now. To let me focus on just being a student like everyone else.”

  “And now we’ve almost graduated.” She let that hang in the air for a while. “Have you told them? That you want to travel?”

  “I can’t,” I whispered. “After all these years of asking them to wait until I graduate, I can’t just be like, ‘Um, yeah, so can we wait yet again? I still want a normal life, thanks.’”

  Rajani laughed softly. “I think your idea of a normal life is pretty skewed, Bry. Growing up here, having five parents, being a princess…”

  Moaning, I put the pillow on top of my ear, blocking out the sound, the light—everything.

  Not everything, though, apparently, because the muffled sound of a knock on the door came through.

  “Coming,” said Rajani, her bare feet padding to the door.

  I pushed the pillow harder, her conversation with whoever had arrived too muffled to understand clearly.

  I let the pillow slip slightly.

  “I’ll leave you two to it, then,” said Rajani softly.

  There was some shuffling, then the door closed, and the cheesy aroma of mac and almond milk cheese coupled with the citrus scent of lemon marinade reminded me that today was chicken and mac, two of my favorite dishes.

  “Did someone bring us—” I started, shooting up, for some reason not expecting to find Derek there holding a tray, Rajani nowhere in sight.

  The corner of my lip twitched. “You know, sneaking into a girl’s room is frowned upon at Veras Academy.”

  “Yeah, if you’re thirteen years old,” said Derek, placing the tray on my nightstand and moving my phone out of the way. He frowned when he looked at the screen, probably noticing the unread messages from himself. “You never miss a meal.”

  Letting out a rough, choking breath, I shifted to sit nearer the stand, picking up my fork. “I’ve never had reason to.” I poked at a noodle, not finding the desire to move the creamy goodness to my lips.

  Derek sat beside me on the bed. “Not even to skip seeing Hazel and her cohorts’ faces?” he asked, nudging me.

  “Not even then.” I brought the empty fork to my mouth, tapping the tines against my lips. “Though seeing Hazel drool over my brother has almost made me lose my appetite a few times.”

  My brother, the traitor, had had nothing to say about this predicament in which I found myself. He fretted constantly over Lacey since she was almost always in pain—except when she was around my aunt, Alanna, whose Nelian ability drained the powers of those around her for a time.

  It worked on every Natch and Nelian but me, the mix of both.

  Who knew if it’d work on Sage. He was a Typical. The only one allowed to live here, to get an education from some of the top Natch instructors around the globe. He could have gone to a Typical university, but his only career plan had always been to teach at Veras alongside half our parents. Having a Natch girlfriend likely played into that now, too.

  He was family. And family had each other’s backs—so I thought.

  “So,” said Derek. “I take it you met the princes.”

  I didn’t ask how he knew what was eating at me. He was observant, and the rumor mill worked fast at Veras Academy. He’d also know there’d be no way I would have kept this information from him for long.

  We trusted each other like that. In some ways, Derek was more my brother than my own flesh and blood—but as soon as I had that thought, I felt a prickling of my scalp and a quiver in my stomach. I didn’t want to think of Derek as that kind of family. Even if he was safe and home and everything I was going to miss as soon as we graduated.

  Dropping the fork to the tray, I dabbed at my eye with the napkin beside the tray.

  Derek wrapped me in his arms, pulling me toward him so that my cheek rested on his shoulder. That inviting scent of ink and paper and musk calmed me, drying most of my tears before they’d even fallen. “You could tell them,” he said. “Tell them you don’t want to marry any of them.”

  “They want me to go on one official date with each,” I said, my voice catching in my throat. “Just for appearances at the very least.”

  Derek swallowed beside me but didn’t comment on it. “You should tell them you don’t want to be queen,” he said after a moment, his fingers rubbing massaging circles on my elbow.

  “I can’t.”

  “Can’t?” Derek’s fingers stopped moving. “Or won’t?”

  I pulled away from him. “Is there a difference?”

  Derek removed his glasses for a moment and massaged his temples. He looked hot with or without them—he could have had a dozen girlfriends by now if he’d ever gotten his head out of a book—but there was something about his bare face that would have made it so much easier…

  To kiss him.

  I squeezed my eyes shut tightly. He was my best friend, and we had such different plans after graduation. I wasn’t going to risk what we had or ask him to change his plans for me.

  “Do you want to go on these dates?” he asked, slipping the glasses back over his nose.

  My adrenaline was spiking slightly, some kind of unperceived threat telling me to be wary. “Excuse me?”

/>   His shoulders sagged, his voice growing flat. “I saw them, Bryony. In the dining hall. They look like fairytale princes or fucking movie stars or something.”

  “And?” I asked, biting back my tongue to tell him the same applied to him. He didn’t deserve to hear it just now. “When you think of me, you think of a drooling, doe-eyed lovesick slut?”

  His eyes bulged. “I said no such thing!”

  He knew how I felt about the Hazel fan club talking about my family that way. I knew I was putting words into his mouth, but what else could he have been implying?

  I stood quickly, practically tripping over his defined thighs to tower over him. “Well, I don’t know what else you mean.”

  The color drained somewhat from his face. “I don’t know. All I know is people are talking, saying you have to marry one or all of them—”

  “One or all?” I scoffed, looking at the ceiling as I tried to bite down the fire boiling inside me. “Why does everyone assume I’m going to have a freaking harem?”

  “Because your mom and aunt do, obviously,” snapped Derek. He stood now, too, gaining the upper hand, a head and a half taller than me.

  I crossed my arms tightly and didn’t let him make me step back. “And that’s what you think of me. Just a harem collector waiting to happen.”

  “You’ve made out with”—he counted off on his hand for show—“at least four Nelians, and Harry Turner in eleventh grade and—”

  “Oh my god!” I shrieked. “Do you hear yourself? I’ve barely dated anyone and you—”

  “You date guys just to make out with them!” He swallowed. “You’re never serious. That’s not normal!”

  He may as well have slapped me.

  “And I suppose the time I found you plastered all over Hazel Thorne in a dark hallway after Homecoming sophomore year, that was just normal dating and not an utter goddamn betrayal of your best friend!”

  Derek’s lips went thin. “That was a mistake. I’ve told you that a dozen times. I’ve apologized a hundred times!”

  “How would I know, really?” I shrugged, biting back the sob threatening to choke out. “If you don’t know me by now, maybe I never knew you at all.”

  Derek opened his mouth and then closed it.

  I turned away so he wouldn’t see me trying not to cry.

  “Bryony, I’m sorry—”

  “The door’s over there,” I snapped.

  I could feel him stiffen behind me.

  “If I walk out now,” he said, “things are just going to be awkward between us.” He put a gentle hand on my bare shoulder, and my stomach fluttered with heat at the touch.

  “Maybe they should be,” I said quietly. “Can’t have the princes think I’m not taking their dates seriously. Or maybe I can. Since I apparently just collect boyfriends like souvenir spoons.”

  “That’s not what I meant. I’m just concerned you’re afraid of commitment—”

  “Go,” I said, pinching my upper arms until it started to hurt. “Just go. I have a whole life to prepare for. That won’t involve you.” That came out harsher than I’d intended. Of course it would involve him, even if we just checked in with each other every so often.

  “I see,” he said quietly. The door opened and still, I didn’t turn around. “Then I hope you’re happy.”

  The way he said it, I wasn’t entirely sure he believed in those words.

  I turned around to apologize, to get him back, but the door shut in my face.

  I clenched my fist, hesitating, warring with myself to take those few steps forward.

  No. Set him free.

  But I’d show him. I’d remain a queen without a man, a queen without an heir.

  I’d go on those dates and send those princes packing.

  I didn’t care how incredibly gorgeous they were. A sudden flush of heat spread out throughout my entire body, erupting from my groin. Startled, I stumbled to the bed, the tingling coming out of nowhere.

  My breaths grew shallow, the images of the princes in front of the classroom dancing through my head.

  But which one? All of them? Was this the Nelian sense my parents had told me about, those pheromones that denoted whom you were meant to spend your life with?

  But which?

  I grew hot, eager to touch myself, to think of each prince, my best friend in turn—now, in the middle of this situation, after that conversation!

  Sobbing, I sat on the edge of my bed, ashamed at myself for being the promiscuously-minded woman Derek had accused me of being.

  Me, a virgin—technically.

  And then I pleasured myself anyway until the tears dried up.

  Chapter Five

  I’d successfully avoided the princes, Derek—anyone, really, even Rajani when she came back into the room because I’d pretended to be asleep—for the rest of the night.

  But it was Friday morning now and there was a day of classes to get to, so I couldn’t stay holed up forever.

  “Bry, we’re going to be late.” Rajani poked my thigh through my comforter with her tablet’s stylus. “And now you definitely won’t have time for breakfast.”

  My traitorous stomach gurgled then, reminding me of the cold, untouched food on my nightstand that still had to be returned to the dining room, and the fact that I hadn’t eaten since lunch.

  “I know you’re awake,” hissed Rajani. “I’ve just been letting you think you’re pulling the wool over my eyes to give you some space.” With a flourish, my comforter flew to the bottom of my bed, the sunlight trickling in around the blinds an affront to my senses.

  I grumbled and sat up, clutching my stomach as it growled and growled.

  Rajani, all dressed and ready for the day, sat beside me. “I was going to say you can’t report yourself to the infirmary over this, but you look like shit.”

  “Thanks,” I muttered, rubbing a hand atop my frizzy, wild, red hair, taking note of everything. It did feel like a bullet train might have hit me in the night. On top of which I was hungry and achy. No food plus using my powers plus the stress of the day before had done a number on me.

  A soft bell chimed out over the hallway speakers, the warning that we only had five minutes to get to first period. The college division was a little laxer with tardies and absences in general—but not for the daughter of the founders.

  My eyes blinked blearily toward my phone on the nightstand, but as I swiped it to get a look, I found no additional messages from Derek awaiting me. Instead, there was just a clunkily written text from Daddy Alarik, who insisted on using Earth technology but always managed to make an adorable fool of himself doing so.

  No. Not adorable. I was too mad at him over this whole prince debacle for it to be adorable.

  Sweet supernova, he wrote, his ridiculous nickname for me. He wrote it so often, autocorrect always got it right for him. Cat PLEASE meet 2day 2 discus your marry. Beside the word “marry,” there was an emoji of a bride.

  Muttering under my breath, I crumpled the thin, sheet-like phone into rest mode in my palm and tossed it on my bed, burying my hands in my face.

  “Bry,” said Rajani, her voice growing serious. “Do you need me to go with you to the infirmary?”

  “I’m fine,” I snapped, harsher than I’d meant to. I sent her a flittering smile. “I’m sorry. I don’t want to talk about it just now. But get to class.”

  “Should I say you’re sick?”

  “Sure,” I said.

  She stood warily, watching me with her bottom lip pinched between her teeth, her tablet clutched to her chest. “I’ll skip, too, if you need me.”

  “I’m fine.” Smiling kind of hurt just then, but I did my best impression of it anyway. “Go. The Renegades try to guest lecture here on Fridays. You might get Torynt as a teacher.”

  She rolled her eyes. “You say that like it’s a good thing.” She smoothed down the wrinkles in her blouse even so, her dark irises glowing. “He’s such a flirt.”

  But in a committed relationship with a
Natch rights lawyer. A polyamorous relationship in which he shared his girlfriend with more than one man—

  Okay. I really needed to get away from this place. The harem gene was just too damn infectious.

  Once Rajani left and the second bell rang, I was left alone with my thoughts. Those thoughts were soon enough interrupted by Papa Zander.

  “Pumpkin,” he said in my head. “Why aren’t you headed to class?”

  Without formalizing the words, I just sent a bevy of images at him: the princes, my other dads telling me about the marriage, Daddy Alarik’s almost indecipherable text—everything. Well, almost everything. I sent a brief flash of me arguing with Derek, but some things were just too personal to share with a dad.

  I could feel Papa Zander probing my brain in the silence.

  “You’re hungry,” he said. “Meet me in the dining hall for breakfast.”

  I sighed.

  “Come on now. It’s nice and empty. Well, almost empty. Alarik’s here. We can talk to him together.”

  He said that as if he’d be on my side.

  Dragging my feet, freshly showered and dressed, I didn’t think I could find an excuse to take any longer in getting to see my two dads who were only here part of the time. The dining hall was pointedly empty, the only sounds along the way the thumping bass of students without classes in their dorm rooms listening to music, then the echoing lecture of instructors seeping out from classrooms.

  Papa Zander walked with a tray from the kitchen, and I noticed Professor Kouta, a former Renegade turned full-time Veras instructor and a pretty good chef, hanging up an apron and nodding at me before walking away. He wasn’t normally a cook here, but…

  “Supernova!” cried Daddy Alarik, distracting me. He waved from a table in the middle of the empty room, a lock of his long, green hair falling just slightly out of place.

  Doing my best to smile, I shuffled over, comparing my form-fitting jeans and dark purple T-shirt to the native Nelian attire he wore. Earthy, leather, and cotton, it complemented his flawless pale-brown complexion well, his angular features popping against the frame of his green hair. As Papa Zander sat down, I compared the two. They couldn’t have looked more different. Zander was bulky, Alarik lean. Zander was shorter, dark hair flecked with white, his face lined with the beginnings of wrinkles but somehow more warm and handsome for it. Papa Zander looked as if he’d lived here on this Earth, had struggled for a long time. Daddy Alarik looked as clean and pristine as the Nelian world that had spawned him.